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  1. #21
    HITLER ME JEZ King Wiired's Avatar
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    A Life In The Day Of Andre Benjamin (Incomplete) - Outkast (only Andre 3000 but still)

    I met you in a club in Atlanta Georgia
    Said me and my homeboy were coming out with an album
    You looked at me like yeah nigga right
    But you gave me you number anyway you were on the talcum
    Powder, how's about them oranges
    Moved away from home to school with big plans
    By day, studied the history of music
    By night, just to pay for that shit, you'd dance
    To get your pants was a mission impossible
    We were both the same age but I
    Suppose wasn't on the same page but in
    The same book of life so I'd paged you when
    I felt you that were getting off of work
    Or either when you're on your way to school
    We starting hanging like Ernie and Bert
    And in my idle head I'm thinking cool
    Just when I think I'm going down your shirt
    You're hiking up your skirt now
    The events that followed had me volley if your hometown would be
    Heaven or hell
    The angelic nastiness you possessed made you by far the best
    Therefore hard to tell
    You'd dropped me off by the dungeon
    Never came in, but I knew that you were wondering
    Now are these niggaz in this house up to something
    Selling crack sack by sacks so they could function?
    Well, yes and no
    Yes we were selling it
    But no it wasn't blow
    Cook it in the basement then move it at a show
    Then grab the microphone and everybody yelled “ho”
    Meanwhile the video starts playing
    BET college radio and a van
    Packed full of niggaz with a blunt in their hand
    And one in their ear
    You know what I'm saying
    But, I kept your number in my old phone
    Got a new chip flip with the roam roam
    So it took me a minute to retrieve seven digits
    But I promised I would call you when I got home
    But, when I got home I never did
    By the time I did, heard that you had a kid
    By some nigga in Decatur
    Who replied see you later when he got the good news, that's life shit
    Now, I'm nineteen with a Cadillac
    My nigga had a Lex with the gold pack
    Got a plaque but I'm living with my pop pop
    So I got glock and a low jack
    You kinda fast for that fella in class who used to draw
    And never said much ‘cause half of what he saw
    Was so far from that place you wanna be
    That words only ****ed it up more follow me
    Are you starting to gather what I'm getting at?
    Now if I'm losing you tell me then I'll double back
    But keep in mind, at the time “keep it real” was the phrase
    Silly once said now, but those were the days
    When spring break
    And Daytona
    And Freakniks
    Made you wanna
    Drop out of college and never go back
    Move to the south but that ain't a Kodak
    Moment, on went myself and big boi
    Well you knew him as Twan
    That's right you were around before this shit begun
    When Twan had a daughter and
    Sort of was made to mature before the first tour
    We hit the road like jack
    Laughed and cried and drived it back with some Yak
    Girls used to say, y'all talk funny, y'all from the islands?
    And I'd Laughed and they just keep smiling
    No, I'm from Atlanta baby
    He from Savannah, maybe
    We should hook up and get tore up and then lay down hey we
    Got to go because the bus is pulling out in 30 minutes
    She's playing tennis disturbing the tenants
    15-love
    Fit like glove
    Description is like
    15 doves
    In a Jacuzzi catching the Holy Ghost
    Making one woozy in the head and comatose, agree?
    Enough about me
    How's about you?
    How's the lil' kid?
    She was about 2 the last time we spoke
    I hadn't smoked or took a shot of drink
    Cause I'd start the 2nd album off on another note
    Now, that note threw some niggaz in the hood off
    But see I'd balled out, and before I fall out
    I'd Slow my Lac down to a nice speed
    The brain is that fried egg I might need
    New direction was apparent
    I was a child looking at the floor staring
    So changing my style was like release for the primitive beast
    Yes I was on the rise, yeast was the street
    To make bread-Never primary concern
    Just to hop on these beats and wait my turn
    I'd meet muslims, ganstas, bitches, rastas, and macoroni niggaz - imposters
    So on a trip to New York on some beeswax
    I get invited to a club where emcees at
    And on stage is a singer with some thing on her head
    Similar to the turban that I covered up my dredz with
    Which I was rocking at the time
    When I was going through them phases trying to find
    Anything that seemed real in the world
    Still searching, but I started liking this girl
    Now you know her
    As Erykah on and on Badu
    Call Tyrone on the phone why you
    Do that girl like that boy you ought to be ashamed
    The song wasn't about me and that ain't my name
    We're young, in love, in short we had fun
    No regrets no abortion, had a son
    By the name of Seven
    And he's five
    By the time I do this mix, he'll probably be six
    You do the arithmetic
    Me do the language arts
    Y'all stand against the wall blindfolded me throw the darts
    To poke you in the heart
    And take you from the start
    To one luxury transportation and a Marta card
    Or either when your girlfriend that went to Mays
    Momma or her daddy let her borrow the Benz because she's smart
    Or maybe if your neighbor does you a huge favor
    And he sells you that rabbit that's been sitting in his yard
    You fix it up.. you trick it out.. you give it rims.. you give it bump
    You give it all your time because that's all you can think about
    ..And that's as far as I got
    Never used to like this song, 'cause of its simplicity. But now I love it

  2. #22
    Am I Losing Friends? +Maniacal=Maniac+'s Avatar
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    Albuquerque- Wierd Al Yankovic

    "Albuquerque"

    Way back when I was just a little bitty boy living in a box under the stairs in the corner of the basement of the house half a block down the street from Jerry's Bait shop
    You know the place
    well anyway, back then life was going swell and everything was just peachy

    Except, of course, for the undeniable fact that every single morning
    My mother would make me a big bowl of sauerkraut for breakfast

    Awww - Big bowl of sauerkraut
    Every single morning
    It was driving me crazy

    I said to my mom
    I said "Hey, mom, what's with all the sauerkraut?"
    And my dear, sweet mother
    She just looked at my like a cow looks at an oncoming train
    And she leaned right down next to me
    And she said "IT'S GOOD FOR YOU"
    And then she tied me to the wall and stuck a funnel in my mouth
    And force fed me nothing but sauerkraut until I was twenty six and a half years old

    That's when I swore that someday
    Someday I would get outta that basement and travel to a magical, far away place
    Where the sun is always shining and the air smells like warm root beer
    And the towels are oh so fluffy
    Where the shriners and the lepers play their ukuleles all day long
    And anyone on the street will glady shave your back for a nickel

    Wacka wacka doodoo yeah

    Well, let me tell you, people, it wasn't long at all before my dream came true
    Because the very next day, a local radio station had this contest
    To see who could correctly guess the number of molecules in Leonard Nimoy's butt
    I was off by three, but I still won the grand prize
    That's right, a first class one-way ticket to

    Albuquerque
    Albuquerque

    Oh yeah
    You know, I'd never been on a real airplane before
    And I gotta tell ya, it was really great
    Except that I had to sit between two large Albanian women with excruciatingly severe body odor
    And the little kid in back of me kept throwin' up the whole time
    The flight attendants ran out of Dr. Pepper and salted peanuts
    And the in-flight movie was Bio-Dome with Pauly Shore
    And, oh yeah, three of the airplane engines burned out
    And we went into a tailspin and crashed into a hillside
    And the plane exploded in a giant fireball and everybody died
    Except for me
    You know why?

    'Cause I had my tray table up
    And my seat back in the full upright position
    Had my tray table up
    And my seat back in the full upright position
    Had my tray table up
    And my seat back in the full upright position

    Ah ha ha ha
    Ah ha ha
    Ahhhh

    So I crawled from the twisted, burnin' wreckage
    I crawled on my hands and knees for three full days
    Draggin' along my big leather suitcase and my garment bag
    And my tenor saxophone and my twelve-pound bowling ball
    And my lucky, lucky autographed glow-in-the-dark snorkel
    But finally I arrived at the world famous Albuquerque Holiday Inn
    Where the towels are oh so fluffy
    And you can eat your soup right out of the ashtrays if you wanna
    It's OK, they're clean

    Well, I checked into my room and I turned down the A/C
    And I turned on the SpectraVision
    And I'm just about to eat that little chocolate mint on my pillow
    That I love so very, very much when suddenly, there's a knock on the door

    Well now, who could that be?
    I say "Who is it?"
    No answer
    "Who is it?"
    There's no answer
    "WHO IS IT?"
    They're not sayin' anything

    So, finally I go over and I open the door and just as I suspected
    It's some big fat hermaphrodite with a Flock-Of-Seagulls haircut and only one nostril
    Oh man, I hate it when I'm right
    So anyway, he bursts into my room and he grabs my lucky snorkel
    And I'm like "Hey, you can't have that"
    "That snorkel's been just like a snorkel to me"
    And he's like "Tough"
    And I'm like "Give it"
    And he's like "Make me"
    And I'm like "'Kay"
    So I grabbed his leg and he grabbed my esophagus
    And I bit off his ear and he chewed off my eyebrows
    And I took out his appendix and he gave me a colonic irrigation
    Yes indeed, you better believe it
    And somehow in the middle of it all, the phone got knocked off the hook
    And twenty seconds later, I heard a familiar voice
    And you know what it said?
    I'll tell you what it said

    It said
    "If you'd like to make a call, please hang up and try again"
    "If you need help, hang up and then dial your operator"
    "If you'd like to make a call, please hang up and try again"
    "If you need help, hang up and then dial your operator"

    In Albuquerque
    Albuquerque

    Well, to cut a long story short, he got away with my snorkel
    But I made a a solemn vow right then and there that I would not rest
    I would not sleep for an instant until the one-nostrilled man was brought to justice
    But first, I decided to buy some donuts

    So I got in my car and I drove over to the donut shop
    And I walked on up to the guy behind the counter
    And he says "Yeah, what do ya want?"
    I said "You got any glazed donuts?"
    He said "No, we're outta glazed donuts"
    I said "Well, you got any jelly donuts?"
    He said "No, we're outta jelly donuts"
    I said "You got any Bavarian cream-filled donuts?"
    He said "No, we're outta Bavarian cream-filled donuts"
    I said "You got any cinnamon rolls?"
    He said "No, we're outta cinnamon rolls"
    I said "You got any apple fritters?"
    He said "No, we're outta apple fritters"
    I said "You got any bear claws?"
    He said "Wait a minute, I'll go check"
    "No, we're outta bear claws"
    I said "Well, in that case - in that case, what do you have?"
    He says "All I got right now is this box of one dozen starving, crazed weasels"
    I said "OK, I'll take that"

    So he hands me the box and I open up the lid and the weasels jump out
    And they immediately latch onto my face and start bitin' me all over
    (rabid gnawing sounds)
    Oh man, they were just going nuts
    They were tearin' me apart
    You know, I think it was just about that time that a little ditty started goin' through my head"
    I believe it went a little something like this . . .

    Doh
    Get 'em off me
    Get 'em off me
    Oh
    No, get 'em off, get 'em off
    Oh, oh God, oh God
    Oh, get 'em off me
    Oh, oh God
    Ah, (more screaming)

    I ran out into the street with these flesh-eating weasels all over my face
    Wavin' my arms all around and just runnin', runnin', runnin'
    Like a constipated weiner dog
    And as luck would have it, that's exactly when I ran into the girl of my dreams
    Her name was Zelda
    She was a calligraphy enthusiast with a slight overbite and hair the color of strained peaches
    I'll never forget the first thing she said to me.
    She said "Hey, you've got weasels on your face"

    That's when I knew it was true love
    We were inseparable after that
    Aw, we ate together, we bathed together
    We even shared the same piece of mint-flavored dental floss
    The world was our burrito
    So we got married and we bought us a house
    And had two beautiful children - Nathaniel and Superfly
    Oh, we were so very very very happy, aw yeah

    But then one fateful night, Zelda said to me
    She said "Sweetie pumpkin? Do you wanna join the Columbia Record Club?"
    I said "Woah, hold on now, baby"
    "I'm just not ready for that kinda commitment"
    So we broke up and I never saw her again
    But that's just the way things go

    In Albuquerque
    Albuquerque

    Anyway, things really started lookin' up for me
    Because about a week later, I finally achieved my lifelong dream
    That's right, I got me a part-time job at The Sizzler
    I even made employee of the month after I put that grease fire out with my face
    Aw yeah, everybody was pretty jealous of me after that
    I was gettin' a lot of attitude

    OK, like one time, I was out in the parking lot
    Tryin' to remove my excess earwax with a golf pencil
    When I see this guy Marty tryin' to carry a big ol' sofa up the stairs all by himself
    So I, I say to him, I say "Hey, you want me to help you with that?"
    And Marty, he just rolls his eyes and goes
    "No, I want you to cut off my arms and legs with a chainsaw"

    So I did

    And then he gets all indignant on me
    He's like "Hey man, I was just being sarcastic"
    Well, that's just great
    How was I supposed to know that?
    I'm not a mind reader for cryin' out loud
    Besides, now he's got a really cute nickname - Torso-Boy
    So what's he complaining about?

    Say, that reminds me of another amusing anecdote
    This guy comes up to me on the street and says he hasn't had a bit in three days
    Well, I knew what he meant
    But just to be funny, I took a big bite out of his jugular vein
    And he's yellin' and screamin' and bleeding all over
    And I'm like "Hey, come on, don'tcha get it?"
    But he just keeps rolling around on the sidewalk, bleeding, and screaming
    (screaming sounds)
    You know, just completely missing the irony of the whole situation
    Man, some people just can't take a joke, you know?

    Anyway, um, um, where was I?
    Kinda lost my train of thought

    Uh, well, uh, OK
    Anyway I, I know it's kinda been a roundabout way of saying it
    But I guess the whole point I'm tryin' to make here is

    I hate sauerkraut

    That's all I'm really tryin' to say
    And, by the way, if one day you happen to wake up
    And find yourself in an existential quandry
    Full of loathing and self-doubt
    And wracked with the pain and isolation of your pitiful meaningless existence
    At least you can take a small bit of comfort in knowing that
    Somewhere out there in this crazy mixed-up universe of ours
    There's still a little place called

    Albuquerque
    Albuquerque
    Albuquerque, Albuquerque
    Albuquerque, Albuquerque
    Albuquerque, Albuquerque
    Albuquerque, Albuquerque

    I said "A" (A)
    "L" (L)
    "B" (B)
    "U" (U)
    "querque" (querque)

    Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque
    Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque
    Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque
    Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque

    Albuquerque



    Whew... Long(11 minutes) Song...

    Meh


  3. #23
    I GOT A JAR OF DIRT. surfinrach90's Avatar
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    *ride a white swan..* heheh, I like it

  4. #24
    Super Mοderator Fox's Avatar
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    IM BLUE DA BA DE DA BA DIE!!! lol
    WiiChat Forum Moderator
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    We remain unwritten through history
    no x will mark us on the map
    but in books of pros and poetry
    you loved me once in a paragraph.



    SteamID: WaywardWaterGod

    For any Pokemon games, PM me.




  5. #25
    Zelda Gamer 1 lozoot92's Avatar
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    As I walk through the valley where I harvest my grain
    I take a look at my wife and realize she's very plain
    But that's just perfect for an Amish like me
    You know, I shun fancy things like electricity
    At 4:30 in the morning I'm milkin' cows
    Jebediah feeds the chickens and Jacob plows... fool
    And I've been milkin' and plowin' so long that
    Even Ezekiel thinks that my mind is gone
    I'm a man of the land, I'm into discipline
    Got a Bible in my hand and a beard on my chin
    But if I finish all of my chores and you finish thine
    Then tonight we're gonna party like it's 1699

    We been spending most our lives
    Living in an Amish paradise
    I've churned butter once or twice
    Living in an Amish paradise
    It's hard work and sacrifice
    Living in an Amish paradise
    We sell quilts at discount price
    Living in an Amish paradise

    A local boy kicked me in the butt last week
    I just smiled at him and turned the other cheek
    I really don't care, in fact I wish him well
    'Cause I'll be laughing my head off when he's burning in hell
    But I ain't never punched a tourist even if he deserved
    An Amish with a 'tude? You know that's unheard of
    I never wear buttons but I got a cool hat
    And my homies all I agree I look good in black... fool
    If you come to visit, you'll be bored to tears
    We haven't even paid the phone bill in 300 years
    But we ain't really quaint, so please don't point and stare
    We're just technologically impaired

    There's no phone, no lights, no motorcar
    Not a single luxury
    Like Robinson Caruso
    It's as primitave as can be

    We been spending most our lives
    Living in an Amish paradise
    We're just plain and simple guys
    Living in an Amish paradise
    There's no time for sin and vice
    Living in an Amish paradise
    We don't fight, we all play nice
    Living in an Amish paradise

    Hitchin' up the buggy, churnin' lots of butter
    Raised a barn on Monday, soon I'll raise another
    Think you're really rightous? Think you're pure in heart?
    Well, I know I'm a million times as humble as thou art
    I'm the pious guy the little Amlettes wanna be like
    On my knees day and night scorin' points for the afterlife
    So don't be vain and don't be whiny
    Or else, my brother, I might just have to get medieval on your heinie

    We been spending most our lives
    Living in an Amish paradise
    We're all crazy Mennonites
    Living in an Amish paradise
    There's no cops or traffic lights
    Living in an Amish paradise
    But you'd probably think it bites
    Living in an Amish paradise

    Wii Code - 1356 7493 1227 4103
    Email Me First @ lozoot@hotmail.com!

  6. #26
    Super Mοderator Fox's Avatar
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    one, two, three four five, everybody in the car so come on lets drive to the, liquer store around the corner the boys say they want some gin and juice but I realy dont want to...
    Angila, Pamela, Sandrah, and Rita, and as I continue, its only gettin sweeter.
    LOL
    Mambo #5,
    Lou Begga
    WiiChat Forum Moderator
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    We remain unwritten through history
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    but in books of pros and poetry
    you loved me once in a paragraph.



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    For any Pokemon games, PM me.




  7. #27
    Super Mοderator Fox's Avatar
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    Sry for postX2
    Where do I run, what have I done, I feel so good I feel so numb yeah.
    Blacken the Sun, what have I done, I feel so bad I feel so numb yeah.
    Rob Zombie, Feel So Numb
    WiiChat Forum Moderator
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    We remain unwritten through history
    no x will mark us on the map
    but in books of pros and poetry
    you loved me once in a paragraph.



    SteamID: WaywardWaterGod

    For any Pokemon games, PM me.




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