Hey, I really like the story. Although I kinda agree that some of it might be a bit predictable and cliche, that isn't necessarily a bad thing. You need to be true to yourself and your story. The best stories in the world are pretty simple. Once you try to get too complex, you loose the simple beauty of things. Good luck and don't stop writing.

I heard someone say once that the best way to make your book perfect is to write the whole thing, then burn it and start all over. Maybe they are right. It would be hard to light that match though.