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Mario is trapped by unknown
force in the glowing temple.
Then mario woke up not knowing what happend. Then a portal which is purple comes out of no where, Mario then enters it with bravery
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ike sees a temple glowing purple and wonder if he should go in
Quote:
Originally Posted by mcl
Mario is trapped by uknown f
force in the glowing temple
Guys, I know you're capable of more than this. It's difficult to work off of, like I said in the rules.
Observe:
Quote:
Originally Posted by WMBQ
Rules
-No god-modding. This means you can't overpower your character with unfair advantages.
Example:
As soon as he saw Bowser jump out from behind the bushes, Fox saw a smash ball appear. He ran up to it, shattered it, and took out the indestructible Landmaster. "No way you can survive this," he said to Bowser grimly.
-No bunnying. This means you can't take control of other people's characters, and you can't say what happens to them. (Be it in a battle or not)
Example #1:
Fox asked Meta Knight if they should set up camp for the night and he agreed.
Example #2:
Bowser fired the Trophy Cannon at Meta Knight and it hit him in the face and he (Meta Knight) turned into a trophy.
-No chatspeak. Pretty self explanatory.
Example:
meta nite pwned bowsr wth glxia drknes
-Try to keep your posts good and lengthy. It doesn't leave people with much material to build off of. Obviously, if you're in a conversation with another character, it can be forgiven.
Example of an unlengthy post:
Fox walked down the forest path with Meta Knight.
Those are the four big rules. Obviously, this is pretty loose, but do your best to make it fun for yourself and for others.
So, as you can see, you both broke one of the rules. It's not going to punish you, but if it becomes regular, I might have to kick you out. Consider this post a warning. Thank you.
ike makes his decison and goes in the glowing temple to see mario trapped in another room ike looks for an entrance to the room but gets shoved to the wall by an invisible being
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Mario is trapped by unknown
force in the glowing temple.
Then mario woke up not knowing what happend. Then a portal which is purple comes out of no where, Mario then enters it with bravery
is this better
sorry im on wii
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It's better, but still makes very little sense. What's the point of the portal? How does your post relate to mine? It might be better if you make your posts when you're on your computer. Your sign-up was so good, and I know for a fact that you can write well if you want to.
Quote:
Originally Posted by alexbel
OT:sorry didnt see that part
ike makes his decison and goes in the glowing temple to see mario trapped in another room ike looks for an entrance to the room but gets shoved to the wall by an invisible being
It's fine, but once again, this is sub-par. Problems: A) I don't really understand the glowing temple... it's just kind of there. There's no explanation. Also, there are no capital letters and no punctuation, which makes it very difficult to read. Now, not to brag, but see my post for an example of good role playing. It would also work if you built your posts around my posts, to show that there's an explanation for what your character does.
Quote:
Originally Posted by WMBQ
Ic:
Link woke up late one morning on the Island of the Ancients. It had just finished being rebuilt from leftover Subspace matter about a month ago, and he, along with the rest of the heroes and heroines who saved the world from Subspace just over a year ago were living there peacefully with the ROBs.
Still, something didn't seem right to him...
It was raining outside again. It had been raining every day for a week. Disappointed at the lack of good weather, he climbed down the ladder from his house. It was cold out because of the rain, but something still seemed eerie. The air had a strange, unnatural, purplish, blackish hue to it. He could've sworn he had seen it somewhere before.
Suddenly, his heart racing, he realized what it was from. Shadow Bugs! From Subspace! In a state of panic, he ran to the Master Hand's Temple.
Ooc:
I'm taking a new character: Master Hand! All of those who want to take a secondary character may, but you don't have to describe what he or she looks like, just provide an image. (Unless you can't, like GigaRidley. In that case, please describe what your character looks like.) Obviously, this applies only to people who have already been accepted.
Name: Master Hand
Alliances: Good
Gender: Unknown, possibly neither
Appearance: Master Hand
Personality: Master Hand is very wise and mysterious. He fights good characters for training purposes, and he serves as a boss at the end of a mode the characters call Classic, but he is the ultimate good and purity, contrary to many people's beliefs. He serves as a leader of the good characters, but doesn't fight, only issues commands.
Ic:
Link arrived at the temple panting. Inside it was very dark, illuminated only by a spotlight over Master Hand. The walls were white, but difficult to see because of the darkness. It wasn't very big inside, but it wasn't small either. The whole temple was composed only of the room in which Master Hand lived, and it was as big as an average classroom.
Master Hand turned to Link. Though he couldn't see Link, he could detect the Hylian's presence. "What is is, Link? It must be urgent, as you arrived panting." Master Hand's voice erupted from nowhere and everywhere at the same time. It echoed off every corner of the room, and was very low and dramatic.
"Master Hand, I- I saw- Outside- subspace," Link answered, breathing heavily at the same time.
Master Hand thought for a moment. It's not like Link to lie... I'm going to believe him, though it is very grave indeed. "Is it actually Subspace, Link, or is it Shadow Bug?"
"Shadow Bug," Link panted.
"There must be a viable explanation," Master Hand answered, "Though all evidence points toward the return of Tabuu," he finished gravely.
"What should I do?" Link asked.
"At the moment, nothing. Shadow Bug itself is indestructible, only when it takes a form can it be destroyed."
Link nodded. Disappointed, he left Master Hand's temple, went back to his house, and lay down in his bed worried.
Ooc:
I'm having Link talk to help the plot, it wouldn't really work if he didn't utter a word like in the Legend of Zelda games.
invisible being:this temple is the remains of what used to be a mighty kingdom i was betrayed here and framed now i capture anyone who enters by a force only spirits can use and you can not escape once you enter there is no escape unless you obtain each peice of the dragoon hidden on the other side of a temple but a weak human would never be able to acomplish such a task
ike heads towards the other side of the temple pissed about what that thing said
OT:i guess i write good when listening to music
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invisible being:this temple is the remains of what used to be a mighty kingdom i was betrayed here and framed now i capture anyone who enters by a force only spirits can use and you can not escape once you enter there is no escape unless you obtain each peice of the dragoon hidden on the other side of a temple but a weak human would never be able to acomplish such a task
ike heads towards the other side of the temple pissed about what that thing said
Please use proper capitalization and punctuation. Seriously. Grammar is also neccesary. You should also not switch back and forth between first and third person. This is also difficult to understand in general. Look ay WMBQ's post. It is good.
Ic:
The Black Knight watched Shadow Bug begin it's voyage to some other place that must have been in the opposite direction of the temple. What is it doing? He thought. Why didn't it follow Link? Perhaps it had bigger fish to fry. Who else was an enemy of Shadow Bug? Had Tabbu returned? It wouldn't be good news for the Black Knight if he did.
Tabbu was too powerful for the Black Knight's liking. But did he have to fear? His own armor was near indestructable. No one could rival him. Except for the child, Ike. He was in possession of a sword blessed by the goddess, that could potentially destroy his own armor. The Black Knight wouldn't be able to warp out of a battle if the child was there, as he had run out of warp powder. He would just have to wait to see how the events would unfold. This was going to get interesting.
The portal was used for shadow bugs to get through. Mario went in there only to find the whole subspace army. Quickly Mario hid and watched behind a strange box. The Ancient Minister's bomb factory. Tabbu was giving plans to engulf the entire world. All the bombs were enough to blow the whole region over. These bombs were different from any bombs seen before. Mario had to go back through the portal and regroup to take on this menace. As Mario went back to the temple many shadow bugs appeared. Mario punched, kicked, burned, and stomped on as many as he could. But more and more came from nowhere. Mario needed help, quick.
(End scene)
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Excellent post. Just please edit "Prime Minister" to "Ancient Minister". I would question why he is back, but I suppose I will find out through future posts. Once again, excellent post.
Excellent post. Just please edit "Prime Minister" to "Ancient Minister". I would question why he is back, but I suppose I will find out through future posts. Once again, excellent post.
srry i changed it to tabbu
because acient minister shouldnt be back
just using same factory
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Character: Jigglypuff Alliances: good Gender: male (this jigglypuff is a male) Appearance: Jiggly looks like a pink balloon with big round blue eyes, stubby arms and legs, and big pointy ears. Personality: Jigglypuffs personaltiy is happyness, jiggly is happy all the time, jiggly also likes to float around like a balloon. Jiggly loves to sing, but jiggly is bad at singing, so he gets mad at anyone who dares to sleep, and marks on there faces with his marker/microphone
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Ooc:
This part takes place before mcl's post
Ic: (somwhere in the middle of subspace)
"It's time" Ganondorf said to himself. "I have been planning this moment ever since that day one year ago. Tabbu fought so visciously. But in the end he was overpowered and destroyed. But today, he will make his glorious resurrection." Ganondorf lets out an evil laugh. "That very day I went out searching for even the slightest remaint of Tabbu. I managed to find a remaining piece of his essence." Ganondorf turns around to look at a small glowing blue orb floating right infront of him. "Now to complete the resurrection... the last item needed is one person with a single piece of the triforce. How fourtanate." Ganondorf looks at his right hand. He reaches out with it and places it on the floating orb. He closes his eyes. The triforce symbol on the back of his hand starts to glow. Thier is a bright flash. Ganondorf opens his eyes. "Welcome back... Tabbu."
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Some guy named Mike on Disturbed's Myspace page
some say that u r the BEST BAND EVER...others say thats just an opinion
i say the "others" are wrong =]
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Last edited by disturbed : 05-12-2008 at 12:34 AM.
The Black Knight watched as Mario came rushing out of Subspace. The Black Knight ran towards the portal as fast as he could with his armor on, which was only a jog, but he was too late. The portal closed in front of him. Now that he had been spotted by Mario, his only option was to fight. He turned around swiftly and made the first strike...
^^awsome story