Goldeneye - A Noobs Tale (for the "older" players amongst us)

[dad uk]

Goddamnit! I bet he was about bloody twelve as well, little bugger! Just picked me out from everyone else and decided to keep me dead. I spawned in a few different places but after a minute or so he bloody found me, what makes it worse is the little sod (I am still sticking with the idea he’s a bloody kid) mêléed me for about three or four of the kills too. Not to worry, as I wasn’t in my zone last night anyway, I’ll get him tonight instead, I'm gonna be on form tonight, preperation is the key. Bag of munchies, tin of beer, kids stuff tidied out of the way, dog sedated (gets in the way of the sensor) and attitude switched to "full on". I’m on pretty much every night to be honest, convincing myself that the other players I see online MUST be adults as it’s late (UK time 10pm onwards) and kids would be in bed with associated teddies, transformer toys and a copy of Big ‘n’ Busty stashed under the mattress. That way I don’t feel immature sat in my living room swearing at some pixilated figures on my TV set and breaking down in tears each time I see my XP score at the end of a game.

Level 17 now and running round with a Stauger or whatever it’s called, still can’t get this hip fire thing though. If someone gets too close it appears my tactic is to aim at the sky and run round in a circle whilst spraying bullets everywhere (watch out pigeons) except at the guy frantically trying to slap me about the head with the butt of his gun. I eventually stop panicking and think about dropping a grenade in my death throes. Just as I’m about to do that “Thwack!” I’m dead. It's either that scenario or a really irritating red cross in the middle of the screen telling me that I'm crap and can't even move in any direction unless I relax, aim at the sensor bar and then run like hell. Is it just me that this happens to? Is there a cure?

Yes I’m too old to be this addicted to a game, yes I’m getting a little better, yes I’m of a certain age group (let’s just say over 30…and then some) and no, I’m not going to let that little sod get me again, not again……at least not tonight anyway.

I’ll be back on tonight and no doubt back here tomorrow, might even update this regularly so you guys can either laugh and poke fun or relax in the knowledge there’s someone else out there that’s having the same issues as you.

It’s a stupid game anyway









But I’ll be on again tonight from about 10pm GMT :yesnod:

Don't worry about the melee thing - it happens to us all ! Have added yer friend code and when my kids are in bed (&not playing legoStarWars3) I too will be on tonight. Cheers - dad 4383-2635-7130 - would be happy to play on your side in a game and watch the pigeons die !!!!!! Damn those flying rats

 

[Kira]

Sorry for my immature attitude :x

 

[Carlito]

Sorry for my immature attitude :x

Mate a reply like that makes up for any misunderstanding. Good on ya and apologies if I typed out of turn. It was aimed moreso at ridiculing us "olds" than you guys.


Thanks for replies fellas and lady.
Will be on tonight but will feel a little weird playing against "dad" but Yeh mate see you online.

Blackecho, dude I was on your team last night for half a game, I joined late, and no word of a lie you were the guy mentioned above...I waved at you, you had no idea who this waving lunatic was and ran off, as I would, and then to add to the rejection some sod shot me in the head Lmao

 

[Blackecho]

I remember wondering if that was you, but didn't know if there was more than one Carlito in the game. Went on to show friends later, but you were offline by then. Will definitely be on tonight.

PS. Sorry I didn't recognise the melee as a wave

 

[trollface]

One question guys I unlocked the Bio-Booster the other day but it didn’t seem to make a worthwhile difference so went back to the hip firing gadget thing instead. Did I get this wrong? Is the Bio-Booster worth sacrificing the hip firing thingy for?

Ever find yourself saying WTF I KNOW I HIT THAT MFo FIRST!!! Haha Well as a noob it took me a while to figure out that with Bio-Booster it takes two melee attacks to kill. Whenever I go to melee someone now I make sure and hit them twice no matter what. I use Bio-Booster on almost all my loadouts. When I first got it my KDR doubled

 

[Blackecho]

Don't worry about the melee thing - it happens to us all ! Have added yer friend code and when my kids are in bed (&not playing legoStarWars3) I too will be on tonight. Cheers - dad 4383-2635-7130 - would be happy to play on your side in a game and watch the pigeons die !!!!!! Damn those flying rats

As another UK dad, we should party up later too with Carlito, a UK Party.

We can chat during the games here: http://www.chatzy.com/617537795088 a chat room for Goldeneye UK.

Let me know if you add me.

 

[John011]

This is good stuff! Got a few laughs. Made my day better, thank you. I myself aren't "old" but I am 27 and sometimes I feel "old" to be playing a video game as much as I do. Makes me feel like a little boy watching scrambled porno on the tv and always looking over the shoulder keeping an eye out so you can quick change the channel if mom or dad walks in.

I am level 40 and average 20 kills or more a game, but I was just like everyone starting off. I was shooting at the floor in the air emptying a clip to find out not a single bullet hit the enemy and ADS this and ADS that, hip fire skills that would be absolutely appalling. Just keep at it, it's what everyone did and has to do. And when you get good enough where you can get 10 player elims or more at a time feels great. Cause now I am the "oldie" sitting in my gaming chair with a big ass grin on my face as I run around pegging enimies off just thinking about what obscene words could be possibly coming out of the other players mouths being blaired at their Television. It's times where I wish GoldenEye was headset compatible.

 

[dad uk]

As another UK dad, we should party up later too with Carlito, a UK Party.

We can chat during the games here: http://www.chatzy.com/617537795088 a chat room for Goldeneye UK.

Let me know if you add me.[/QUOTE]

Ok - have added you - maybe we should become the 'dad's army' clan (hope I'm not showing my age here for those of you who don't remember that Prog) - did I play with you and gueston yesterday ? good game - we did slightly destroy the other team
Cheers
dad fc 4383-2635-7130 lvl50

PS the 'dad' thing is courtesy of my kids (5&7yrs) who refuse to let me change it - they played on my game for first three days but I've banned them now as my kdr was suffering............. grumpy old dad !

 

[Blackecho]

Ah, was that you, lvl 50? - Yes, it was a fairly destructive team!

Spooky, mine are 7&5 too

Can I be Pike?

 

[Carlito]

Well I got on last night only to find myself fighting against Blackecho, ok let's get to it. Just as I was about to get my game on Daisy my 5 yr old woke up and threw up all over the bedroom. Got her sorted out with a mixture of "Oh sweetheart its ok, daddys here." coupled with the voice in my head (I call him trevor) saying just go back to sleep ffs. Didn't happen, and the night of ruthlessly gunning ppl down and dying in the most majestic ways was replaced by a night of wiping puke off my daughter and myself and constant running up and down stairs. Kids!

Try again tonight and yeah Dads Army is the way forward.

 

[Blackecho]

Ouch, bad night mate.

Try again tonight?

 

[HOOT]

http://www.chatzy.com/617537795088[/URL] a chat room for Goldeneye UK.

Let me know if you add me.

Im a Uk dad!!! ( well I'm actually Australian but living in Notts, and the first babies due date is June14th)
Close enough I say!

Be happy to get involved with any GE UK experience's
Friend Code:2871-3279-0214 (Personal Message if you wanna add)
level 39

Chatzy chatroom is perfect for me. can finally chat whilst online!
Let me Know

 

[Blackecho]

http://www.chatzy.com/617537795088[/URL] a chat room for Goldeneye UK.

Let me know if you add me.

Im a Uk dad!!! ( well I'm actually Australian but living in Notts, and the first babies due date is June14th)
Close enough I say!

Be happy to get involved with any GE UK experience's
Friend Code:2871-3279-0214 (Personal Message if you wanna add)
level 39

Chatzy chatroom is perfect for me. can finally chat whilst online!
Let me Know

Adding you then, you on now?

 

[Carlito]

I'm gonna be on in q bit. About 10:30ish, kids ill again

 

[Blackecho]

I'm gonna be on in q bit. About 10:30ish, kids ill again

Poor kid, I'll be on then I'm sure.

Probably find me in chatzy: http://www.chatzy.com/617537795088 if you want to arrange a party.