ok so, Jesus has jsut gotten crucified on the cross, he looks over and he can see the crowd and the entire town of followers and the buildings. And he says
"Peter, Come to me."
And Peter comes forth and tries to step pass the gaurds and the whip him and beat, throw him back into the crowd. Jesus again says.
"Peter, Come Closer
He does and trys to step pass the gaurd and once again gets beaten and whipped.
Jesus says again.
"Peter, Come to me."
Peter stands up and starts to walk toward Jesus, he gets beaten and whipped. The gaurds thought he never did anything to retalliate, lets just let him see Jesus, one last time.
He stumbels forward
"yes my lord i have endurred serveral whippings for you, what is it you need?"
He looks down on him.
"Peter i can see your house from here.
im just trying to help you before you get introuble, racist jokes dont bother me at all but they could bother someone else and also other people dont know you mexican
A lady walks into a bar and sees a really cute guy sitting at the counter. She goes over and asks him what he is drinking.

"Magic Beer", he says.

She thinks he's a little crazy, so she walks around the bar, but after that there is no one else worth talking to,goes back to the man sitting at the bar and says,

"That isn't really Magic Beer, is it?"

"Yes, I'll show you." He takes a drink of the beer, jumps out the window, flies around the building 3 times and comes back in the window.

The lady can't believe it: "I bet you can't do that again."

He takes another drink of beer, jumps out the window, flies around the building three times, and comes back in the window.

She is so amazed that she says she wants a Magic Beer, so the guy says to the bartender, "Give her one of what I'm having."

She gets her drink, takes a gulp of the beer, jumps out the window, plummets 30 stories, breaks every bone in her body, and dies.

The bartender looks up at the guy and says, "You know, Superman, you're a real jerk when you're drunk!"