Your Typical Game of Wii Goldeneye?

TampaBondo

Number 1 GE Wiimote User
Dec 24, 2011
1,195
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Cumberland, RI
Wii Online Code
8297-0574-6373-3839
So I thought I would air my frustrations, and at the same time start a comical thread. Does anyone else have this same experience?

I started playing today around 10:30. Turned on the wii and after 5 failures to connect to the server, got the usual wii freeze with a beep. That's a good thing, though, because anytime the wii freezes when connecting, I know that after I hold in the power button, say a little prayer, sacrifice a lamb, do a rain dance, rub a rabbit's foot, and reverently reboot the machine, it will definitely connect for whatever reason the next time around. Finally online with Goldeneye.

Before starting a game, I go to check my place on the leaderboard. Good news: over 2.5M legit xp and counting. Bad news: about 1/2 of the people ahead of me xp cheated in some way to get there. Oh well, I don't know why I care about that stuff anyway. The game's been out for going on 2 years. I guess I am old-school. Onto the game.

So I start in regular conflict. Game is going well until I get to 29 with a 10 point lead. Host quit. Surprise there! Well who needs him anyway, sore loser. Fortunately, the system selected me to host next. I won 6 or 7 in a row until some people named "POTATO SALAD" and "&Minny" joined. They beat me fair and square in back to back games. Good game to them. Then they left and I started another winning streak. Good.

After winning a couple more, I decided to change. I thought, "Let's switch is up and play golden gun for a bit." Oh wait, no. <insert "family feud" x sound here> Wii freeze with a beep after I get up to 25 points and leading by 15. Then of course after rebooting, the game puts me back in that same game just in time to see it end with me at the bottom - 0 kills 0 deaths. Tell me we've never seen this one before.

So the carnage continues for an hour or so. Time flies when I play this game so much that my dog had to come remind me to take a break and walk him. Whatever, I'll give the noob squad a break from their daily beatings. Of course when I got back, my Wii mote batteries died in the middle of the game. Here and I thought someone was hacking me because the game wasn't allowing me to run. Nah. I was just out of juice! Who knew!?

So the host quits between matches of golden gun and we get a new host. Of course I should've known what was going to happen when I saw the new host's name: :):-:://{})) or something like that. Hacker. My silencer was now gone. Everything started blowing up sideways. No one had to reload anymore. People started flying. The sky started falling. Golden monkeys riding horseback while eating bananas started descending from the heavens. The hacker-host even had some cheating super-auto-pistol-killing-cannon I've never seen before. When he fired, it sounded like something getting stuck in a vacuum cleaner. 5 and 6 people were dying at a time about every 3 seconds. Bottom line, all digital hell started breaking loose. I quit that one. Why waste my time? You can't play against Satan after all, even if he was giving you 666 xp per kill.

And so the above insanity test continued for about 7 hrs...it is the end of a long day of Wii Goldeneye. I gritted it out and significantly added to my xp total. I've moved up the meaningless leaderboard yet again. I've passed some legitimately good players, and a whole bunch of cheating, not-so-good players. My k/d ratio has improved. My wins/losses have improved. I am another day closer to senility with nothing material in the world to show for it. I wonder why I keep doing this to myself every day. This must be one heck of a good, addicting game for me to keep plaaaaaaaa...........

LOST CONNECTION TO HOST.
RETURNING TO LOBBY.

Damnit. Not again!
 
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I enjoyed reading this. It was quite humorous. I can relate to some of your frustrations and issues with the game. At leas you take it lightly. good day.
 
I'm baffled tampa.

Wheren't you the guy that blew himself up with grenades?
The guy that said he didn't care about his ratio's.
Now your checking your k/d ratio.. (the exp one is more understable).

Also your wii is messed up.
Sure i get a wii freeze every now and then but not that often.
Though I am probably making a fool out of myself for tking serious an exagerration.

Lastly 7 hours? That's just pure grinding man, that ain't no fun. (At least not for me when i went through such a stretch when i 'smelled' lvl 56.)
 
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Yeah, I still enjoy the occasional suicidal smoke and frag grenade fest every now and then. In the grand scheme of things, when you have literally THOUSANDS of games played, it really doesn't affect your stats all that much. And it is only "grinding" if you are working toward a particular goal, like getting to 56 for example. Besides, 7 hrs in real time only feels like 3 in GE time...time flies when I play this game because I enjoy the competition so much. This is also the reason I could NEVER get another console, like a HEXBox 720 or something, whatever it's called. I prob would never put the controller down! Like I said, Goldeneye for me is just as much as "timeless classic" as the original N64 version - I think they did a great job with it...
...well other than some of the things I mentioned above ;-)
 
That was a fun read! 7 hours of GE playtime. That's serious, man... seriously serious. There were a few times over college breaks when my friends and I stayed up all night playing N64 Goldeneye or Perfect Dark multiplayer. I cannot imagine what would happen if I did so now. It's getting harder and harder to recover from all-nighters. I'd probably feel jetlagged for a day or two. Anyway, thanks for sharing your humorous insight.
 
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No problem, Bosco! Yeah, I remember those good-old college days...of staying up all night playing different types of games (some with a controller and others with an assortment of beverages). N64 Bond and Mario Kart was definitely part of it at times... ah the good old dayz...
 
No problem, Bosco! Yeah, I remember those good-old college days...of staying up all night playing different types of games (some with a controller and others with an assortment of beverages). N64 Bond and Mario Kart was definitely part of it at times... ah the good old dayz...

Nothing better than a couple cases of Naddy Light and Mario Kart (N64) to which you have to drink the difference of which place you finish in a race....if you finish last, YOU HAD TO SHOTGUN A BEER! Thank goodness I wasn't bad at Kart... lol.
 
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Idea for a change to the game code (not that it would be made at this point anywayz...):
- Just make it so that no one can leave a game when the game timer is less than one minute.

1) This would prevent 85% of host quits and people getting xp ripped-off unfairly
2) It would prevent people from leaving right before the game ends to prevent taking a loss. I have noticed this a lot lately, particularly when I am in a game with another 56 and he/she knows they aren't going to win. And don't make me start naming names here - you know who you are and you ALWAYS do it!
 
looking at those ideas Tampa, im sorry but im going to have to point out a flaw in your plan.......

well 1 flaw really,

that being you forgot to take into account the players themselves.

yup those host quitting and/or rage quitting (when losing) players.

they would only go and host quit with 2 mins left and the rage quitters a moment or two before them.
 
Yep, the only patch that could truly fix this host quit problem would be to integrate host migration/have the servers be the host itself, which is what they should'a done in the first place IMO. Preventing quitting in-game will just be met with people turning off their systems, sadly...
 
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At least it would teach them patience. I know if I had to reboot my system every time I wanted out of a game at the last minute, I'd probably stop doing it. It takes a lot longer to reboot and reconnect online than it does to quit to the lobby.
 
In Mariokart the race finishes, and you get the score of the current standings.(if i recall correctly) The one who loses connection by having his power shut off, gets high scores.
People started using it to obtain 9999 which was just sad. Speaking of which a year ago i at long last manage to reach 9999. I'm telling you it was the hardest thing. You see, at the time i was still using a wireless connection, which renewed it's IP-adress every so often, resulting me getting kicked out of the game. You can't imagine the frustrating of losing all your points like that time and time again.

Back to the topic at hand;
Yesterday my game of goldeneye existed of the following: Losing, losing and losing some more.
I swear i was totally out of it. I was shooting miles off. My mind was there but the body refused to follow.
I don't think i ever played that badly before. It actually became funny.
 
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Yeah, some days are better than others... Some days you can are shooting everyone right between the eyes and other days it feels like you can't hit the broad side of a barn! Oh well - that's what pro-tube is for! LOL
 
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