What to say to your suicidal friend...

AndThen?

pull the trigger.
Jun 11, 2007
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Adelaide, Australia.
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What the hell am I supposed to say?! He keeps talking about it, I'm on the phone right now to him. He's hysterical, probably drunk and I'm so stuck.
 
Would you want to die with all these wonderful things here on Earth. think about it! You have so many friends and all of that. Please Don't. I'm your best friend and You have other friends and family that love you so much.

EDIT: But seriously, he has to have a good reason. And does he know if he kills himself, he will spend and eternity IN HELL?!?
 
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I'm his only friend. I don't think calling him a retard will help. I'm so lost... No idea what to say to him.
 
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He doesn't want to live anymore, basically. Normally when he talks about it I can help him by making him think about what he has to live for. Now, rationality is out of the window. I'm scared he'll do it.
 
Hey man, I'm just going so I can't offer much...I don't know how much this might help you personally, but people who say they will, don't usually do it. That's what I get told anyway. But try and tell him what he has to live for, offer him the good things he has, such as yourself and anything you can think of. The longer you keep him on the phone the better, just keep talking to him, about anything! Hope he's okay bud.

EDIT: Sorry just saw your post. Just keep trying to talk to him. You got to think of anything to talk about, make him think he has things to live for. I know it sounds hard but you got to give it a shot. If you have to make him feel guilty, like what it'll do to you and anybody else in his life.
 
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Guilt him out of it say it might not mater to him that he lives but it matters to you maybe he cares about someone more them himself try to make him think what well happen to them if he is gone
 
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Thanks heaps Lewi, I'll do my best. It's hard now because he's in hysterics. He's barely listening to me. It's basically me listening to him talk about it... I'll do my best :\.
 
Ya say thanks to Lewi but not me PFFT JK i dont realy care but i hope he doesnt do it!

Try calling someone he lvoes the msot like his mother or somethign
 
Tell him *im your best friend don't do this to me or your family now just go to sleep & we can talk about this in the morning k buddy but please please don't kill yourself it's not worth it.*
 
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Sorry PrinceLink, we posted at the same time. Yeah I'll try and guilt him out of it. I don't know... he's just not in the right frame of mind at the moment.

Why the hell did his parents leave their troubled kid at home alone with alcohol?!
 
Maybe this will help.
One of the most frightening experiences a person can have is hearing a friend or loved one say they want to die. Even to hear a complete stranger say these words is hard. Each day in our chat room and forum, there are dozens of pleas for help. How can one cope and try to maintain one's own sanity? Here are some tips I have gathered from various sources and from personal experience.

1. There are no right or wrong things you can say if you are speaking out of love and concern. Just be yourself. Show that you care by talking to them, holding them while they cry, or whatever else is necessary.

2. A suicidal person usually is carrying around some burden that they feel they just can't handle anymore. Offer to listen as they vent their feelings of despair, anger and loneliness. Sometimes this is enough to lighten the load just enough for them to carry on.

3. Be sympathetic, non-judgmental, patient, calm, accepting. The person will pick up on your attitude and begin to mirror this.

4. Don't be afraid to ask, "Are you having thoughts of suicide?" You are not putting ideas in their head. This will give you some valuable information about how to proceed in helping him.

5. If the answer is yes, ask these three questions:

Have you thought about how you would do it?

Do you have what you need to carry out your plan?

Do you know when you will do it?

Fortunately the majority of people will either say that they have no definite plans or that they don't have the nerve to do it themselves. Although this is still a serious situation, you know that they are probably not in imminent danger of hurting themselves. Take their words as a plea for help and proceed with helping them to get the assistance that they need. Urge them to seek professional help as soon as possible.

If the answers they give you lead you to believe they are in immediate danger, do not hesitate to contact the authorities. They may tell you that you are betraying them or making them angry. You may feel like you will lose their friendship if you take action. Just remember that you may permanently lose their friendship if you don't. When they're well again, they will thank you.

6. Keep them talking. This will allow them to reduce the emotional burden they are carrying. and give them time to calm down. The longer you keep them talking, the more you can take the edge off their desperation. As their momentum winds down, it's harder for them to act on their feelings.

7. Avoid trying to offer quick solutions or belittling the persons feelings. How big he perceives the problem to be and how much he is hurting over it is what counts. Rational arguments do little good to persuade a person when they are in this state of mind. Instead offer your empathy and compassion for what he is feeling without making any judgments about whether he should feel that way.

8. If the person has already started a suicide attempt, call for help immediately. If they are still conscious, get what information you can about what substances they have ingested, how long ago did they ingest them, how much did they take, are they also consuming alcohol, when did they last eat, what is the general state of their health. Call 911, Poison Control, or an appropriate emergency contact number in your area and explain the situation. Keep calm and follow any steps they may give you to assist your friend.

9. If you are in a situation--such as an online friendship--where you know very little about the person, encourage them to call 911 on their own or to call a suicide hotline in their area.. This is your best option, because a local agency such as 911 or a hotline may be able to trace the call and get assistance to them. If they refuse to call, do your best to learn whatever personal information you can about the person. Don't hesitate to ask them for their address, phone number, and other information to help dispatch an emergency crew to their home. Ask for the same information in item #9 as well.

10. Dealing with a suicide threat is very stressful. Seek assistance to decompress afterwards. Talk to a trusted friend, your pastor, etc. about what you've been through and how you feel about it.

11. If all your attempts fail, don't blame yourself. You did all that you could. This person ultimately made their own choices, for good or bad. If you were very close to the person, it may be wise to seek out grief counseling and suicide survivor support groups.

Source
 
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