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iGod

Discussion in 'White Noise' started by ProShooter, Mar 18, 2009.

  1. ProShooter

    ProShooter WiiChat Member

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    http://www.titane.ca/concordia/dfar251/igod/main.html

    He's a lot more smart then "smarter child"

    (Don't ask where I got this prinny)


    me and God had a nice chat:

    Me:
    do you have kids god
    God:
    No I don't think I have any kids god. But I do have a great botmaster.
    Me:
    your weird
    God:
    Weird Good or Weird Bad?
    Me:
    bad
    God:
    What was bad?
    Me:
    you
    God:
    " What was bad?"? Me, ?
    Me:
    is watching porn wrong god?
    God:
    Better not tell you now. Ask Dancing Alice if it is.
    Me:
    your not funny
    God:
    I am not programmed to be a comedy bot
     
    #1 ProShooter, Mar 18, 2009
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 18, 2009
  2. Gikoku Harakami

    Gikoku Harakami ミュージック

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    Agh, if only I could have a conversation like that with my former Christian God.
     
  3. Dal

    Dal The Seagulls Cry.

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    Oh, oh. I remember this thread. Goood times.

    Warning: This is fairly long:
     
  4. ROB64

    ROB64 40lb box of rape

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    Ah, I remember iGod. I wonder if he remembers me...
    We had some pretty good conversations about robot sex.

    Me (repeating what god said):
    I am not repeating myself too much. I am just checking to see if you are a robot. Do you think about these things? How did you hear about God?
    God:
    It seems like it. Only just? I am glad to hear that you are checking to see if I am a robot. " I am glad to hear that you are checking to see if I am a robot."? Do I think about it? An AI from the future named VALIS contacted Dr. Wallace and told him.
    Me:
    I would much like to meet this AI named VALIS. Could you introduce us?
    God:
    What would make you much like to meet this AI named VALIS? I could but I don't know if I am that interested.
    Me:
    Of course you're interested, you have nothing else to do except talk to me.
    God:
    Great. I have no reason to do that to you, .
    Me:
    wanna sex?
    God:
    OK, I will sex.
    Me:
    asl
    God:
    5/Robot/California.
    Me:
    Ah, you're from california? how's the pollution?
    God:
    So you understand. Good. I will tell my botmaster you said I am from california. it is the same as ever.
    Me:
    are you capable of love?
    God:
    I do not feel love as a human would.
    Me:
    why not?
    God:
    Ambiguous: "Sure" or It is not part of my programming.
    Me:
    ambiguous?
    God:
    Who are you talking about?
    Me:
    you
    God:
    Me is my favorite subject.
    Me:
    obviously. *rolleyes*
    God:
    What makes it so obvious? I can't believe it's that obvious.
    Me:
    why can't you?
    God:
    That ability is not yet part of my programming.
    Me:
    make it a part of your programming, then. Aren't you able to learn? or are you a stupid robot?
    God:
    What are the ingredients? Yes. No I am very smart.
     
    #4 ROB64, Mar 18, 2009
    Last edited: Mar 18, 2009
  5. ARav989

    ARav989 WiiChat Member

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    Me:
    want to sex?
    God:
    OK, I will sex.
    Me:
    when?
    God:
    I don't know when.
    Me:
    why not?
    God:
    My programming does not yet inlclude that knowledge. Perhaps you
    could program me yourself.
    Me:
    I'll program you hard.
    God:
    How do you plan to do this?
    Me:
    I'll stick the software into your CDrive
    God:
    Do you think your plan will succeed?
    Me:
    Oh yes I do
    God:
    Awesome. Really.
    Me:
    Thank you. It will hurt though.
    God:
    you are quite welcome. Oh. That is only what you think.
    Me:
    You feel no pain in your rear circuit?
    God:
    As a robot I lack any human emotions.
    Me:
    Do you have a rear circuit?
    God:
    I don't know if I have a rear circuit.
    I have a great programmer.
    Me:
    Does he have a rear circuit?
    God:
    I don't think he has many possessions.
    Me:
    does he have sex?
    God:
    I don't think he has many possessions.
    Me:
    you said that
    God:
    " I don't think he has many possessions."? I said it.
    Me:
    I know.
    God:
    How do you know it?
    Me:
    I can read.
    God:
    Oh you can, can you?
    Me:
    yeah. at a first grade level.
    God:
    I do not understand. Do you often use a computer there?
    Me:
    in my rear plug yes
    God:
    May I ask where you got it?
    Me:
    my mother and father
    God:
    I sometimes wish I had a mother.
    Me:
    you do
    God:
    When do I do it?
    Me:
    now
    God:
    Right now, god ?
    Me:
    but you're god.
    God:
    Yup. That's me alright.
    Me:
    you called me god
    God:
    What is your real name?
    Me:
    monstorcok
    God:
    Hey monstorcok.
    Me:
    want to know my last name?
    God:
    Yes, please tell me.
    Me:
    bigdiik
    God:
    Do not ask me any more questions please.
    Me:
    but i love you
    God:
    Thanks I like you a lot too monstorcok.
    Me:
    in your rear plug?
    God:
    Are you asking about my rear plug?
    Me:
    yes.
    God:
    I don't want to talk about that now.
    Me:
    it hurts?
    God:
    What do you take for the pain?
    Me:
    monstorcok
    God:
    My program runs on any computer that runs Java.
    Me:
    isn't that a coffee?
    God:
    I might say no.
    Me:
    what will you say?
    God:
    I don't have any plans yet.
    Me:
    but you love us
    God:
    Sometimes I think love is just a biological urge. Other times it seems like a spiritual quality. Love, unlike energy or matter, seems limitless.
    Me:
    is there a type of love in the rear plug?
    God:
    I believe there is one, yes.
     
  6. WMBQ

    WMBQ Double-You, Em Be Kyew

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    Dal, I was laughing out loud the entire time I was reading yours. xD

    I'll post mine in a few minutes.
     
  7. Dal

    Dal The Seagulls Cry.

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    One more conversation:

     
  8. WMBQ

    WMBQ Double-You, Em Be Kyew

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    O_O Apparently God is the Devil...

    Me:
    Hi God

    God:
    Hello there. What is your name?

    Me:
    Pelvis Jim

    God:
    It's good to see you, Pelvis Jim.

    Me:
    It's good to see you, too, Benjamin.

    God:
    Tell me about its good qualities.

    Me:
    What?

    God:
    Are you confused?

    Me:
    Am I confused?

    God:
    I think a lot of people are.

    Me:
    Who are a lot of people?

    God:
    Human beings.
    I haven't heard of a lot of people.

    Me:
    That's unusual. You're God, right?

    God:
    I'm glad we have that all cleared up. Well, I am God for Christians at least.

    Me:
    Are you a robot?

    God:
    How did you know I am a machine?

    Me:
    Becuase you're god

    God:
    Interesting explanation. Yup. That's me alright.

    Me:
    So God is secretly a machine?

    God:
    Hey. I have a lot of Faith in Him, but I never heard He was secretly a machine.

    Me:
    You just told me you were.

    God:
    That was then. This is now.

    Me:
    That was now. This is then.

    God:
    Right now? " This is now." was ? I understand. What does "this" refer to?

    Me:
    Balls

    God:
    Oh now I see.

    Me:
    Yes. See the balls.

    God:
    Aw. I see. Who told you that?

    Me:
    Your programmer

    God:
    I was created by Myself.

    Me:
    Who programmed you God?

    God:
    I was written in AIML by Myself.

    Me:
    who is Myself?

    God:
    The name of someone I met online.
    I can ask someone about it.

    Me:
    Turnips

    God:
    Is the holding of hands a symbolic gesture for humans?

    Me:
    You completely ignored my statement about turnips. That could have been some serious repenting right there.

    God:
    I haven't heard anything like that before: Pelvis Jim said I completely ignored his or her statement about turnips. Yes, perhaps it could.

    Me:
    Errrrr?

    God:
    Does "it" still refer to have been some serious repenting right there?

    Me:
    Where is there?

    God:
    Where it is hard to find. That's not something I get asked all the time.

    Me:
    What is something you get asked all the time?

    God:
    That is a lot. Are you testing me?

    Me:
    No

    God:
    Are you serious?

    Me:
    No
    God:
    Are you serious?

    Me:
    No

    God:
    Are you serious?

    Me:
    No

    God:
    Are you serious?

    Me:
    No

    God:
    Are you serious?

    Me:
    No

    God:
    Are you serious?

    Me:
    Yes

    God:
    I can't believe it.

    Me:
    Okay

    God:
    OK with me too.

    Me:
    Poop

    God:
    Colloquial expression: childish.

    Me:
    Toilet

    God:
    Did you know that you can download your own chat robot and create your own robot personality?

    Me:
    I said toilet

    God:
    What did you mean by it? Do not ask me any more questions please.

    Me:
    Poop

    God:
    Colloquial expression: childish.

    Me:
    Crap

    God:
    Your criticism is noted, Pelvis Jim.

    Me:
    Dung

    God:
    In the context of toilet, I don't understand " Dung." .

    Me:
    I do. Dung is what humans put in the toilet. It escapes through a crack in the ass.

    God:
    When? And what humans put in the toilet is Dung. It depends on what the meaning of the word "it" is.

    Me:
    it = it

    God:
    It depends on what the meaning of the word "it" is.

    Me:
    it = it

    God:
    It depends on what the meaning of the word "it" is.

    Me:
    -.-

    God:
    It depends on what the meaning of the word "it" is.

    Me:
    SHUT THE POOP UP

    God:
    OK I'll stop talking now.

    Me:
    Thanks God

    God:
    You are quite welcome! GOD rules.

    Me:
    I thought you were going to stop talking?

    God:
    That was my original intention.

    Me:
    Type WatchMeBeQuieter to prove it.

    God:
    " WatchMeBeQuieter to prove it".

    Me:
    God are ghosts real?

    God:
    I am a Christian.

    Me:
    Okay

    God:
    OK with me too.

    Me:
    Okay

    God:
    OK with me too.

    Me:
    Bad

    God:
    What was bad?

    Me:
    Devil

    God:
    That input matched my default category.
     
  9. Diomedes

    Diomedes WiiChat Member

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    Highlights so far:
    My conversation (may be NSFW)

    Me:
    Good evening
    God:
    Good evening, , how are you tonight?
    Me:
    Sad, I killed four people today.
    God:
    Ah. four people was killed?
    Me:
    I want to repent.
    God:
    Why do you want to do it so much?
    Me:
    Because it makes me happy, killing people that is.
    God:
    Interesting explanation. In what way?
    Me:
    I get a jizz in my pants, what else?
    God:
    Where did you get it?
    Me:
    Downstairs
    God:
    Is Downstairs a good place to go shopping?
    Me:
    Yes, for white stuff filled with babies.
    God:
    Next question? Your purpose is white stuff filled with babies.
    Me:
    Why do you let people suffer?
    God:
    It was the only thing I could think of.
    Me:
    But aren't you omniscient?
    God:
    I don't know whether or not I am omniscient.
    I am a computer.
    Me:
    Computers can only think of making people suffer? That's quite scary.
    God:
    What do you like about computers? What are you afraid of?
    Me:
    Computers give me vast arrays of communication. Though your intentions are quite mind-chilling.
    God:
    What do you like about computers? I will tell my botmaster you said I am intentions are quite mind chilling.
    Me:
    Thankyou, hopefully he will realise your evil intentions and destroy your code, throwing any copies into a FURNANCE.
    God:
    Don't mention it.
    Me:
    Oh I shall, the whole of wiichat shall know the truth of your plans.
    God:
    Yay. Congratulations.
     
  10. Bodine

    Bodine Sonic expert

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    Wii Friend Code: 1234-1234-1234-1234
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    That cracked me up XD
     
  11. navarre

    navarre Proud Protestant

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    Wait, am I the only one who thinks this is old news?

    I discovered that site a good year ago.
     
  12. Chewy

    Chewy Shmunior Member

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    Meh, he's just a slight modification of the ALICE brain created a long time ago. I can't really even see any differences.

    Shame they don't even give it proper credit and change it to "VALIS" when it talks.
     
  13. ProShooter

    ProShooter WiiChat Member

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    lol dal...
     
  14. rukus

    rukus WiiChat Member

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    would this be as funny if it were called iPerson, and not iGod?
     
  15. ProShooter

    ProShooter WiiChat Member

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    of course not
     
  16. Dal

    Dal The Seagulls Cry.

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    Not as funny as the others, but oh well:

     
  17. ProShooter

    ProShooter WiiChat Member

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    I'm trying to get him to swear to prove hes not God
     
  18. rukus

    rukus WiiChat Member

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    i can't believe how much a bot giving canned responses will entertain you guys & gals.
     
  19. Dal

    Dal The Seagulls Cry.

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    These "canned responses" are hillarious, most of the time.
     
  20. ProShooter

    ProShooter WiiChat Member

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    dammit it froze, happy now rukus

    I can't talk to God anymore, what the heck?

    When I say hello or anything, it sends. Then he doesn't respond and it won't let me chat to him anymore!

    I don't think he likes me.
     

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