Marriage Overrated?

[Napalmbrain]

What are you basing that on? What do you consider a "while"? The wedding age average has been going up, as well as the divorce rate, so clearly not waiting long enough isn't the problem.

Perhaps it's the fault of our godless, decadent liberal society? Personally I don't see higher divorce rates as actually being a problem. If more people are getting divorced, that clearly means a lot of people aren't happy being together. Okay, so it means families get split up, but is it wise for two people to stick together when they don't like each together? Just ask my mum- my grandparents were constantly at each other's throats, only staying together for her sake, and she hated it.

 

[Zorba]

My view of marriage is moving in together with someone you love just to find out the many flaws the person actually has....

your view is grossly mis informed. how many people these days wait till they are married before living together. i konw of 1 couple in my extended circle of friends (ie, not close friend but an acquaintance).

you shouldnt marry the person you can live with, you marry the person you cant live without.

 

[Brawny]

Perhaps it's the fault of our godless, decadent liberal society? Personally I don't see higher divorce rates as actually being a problem. If more people are getting divorced, that clearly means a lot of people aren't happy being together. Okay, so it means families get split up, but is it wise for two people to stick together when they don't like each together? Just ask my mum- my grandparents were constantly at each other's throats, only staying together for her sake, and she hated it.

I wouldn't say liberal, but godless and decadent yeah.

If there's a chance of divorcing someone, the marriage shouldn't have happened at all.

It's really weird. Marriage is both looked upon highly, and then cast aside at the same time. People think that the moment they say I do, their relationship is automatically going to be problem free, and the first sign of problems, they just jump ship. I wonder if there was any form of counselling involved there?

 

[Napalmbrain]

I wouldn't say liberal, but godless and decadent yeah.

You say that as if it's a bad thing. :lol:

 

[mizzouHHR]

If there's a chance of divorcing someone, the marriage shouldn't have happened at all.

It's really weird. Marriage is both looked upon highly, and then cast aside at the same time. People think that the moment they say I do, their relationship is automatically going to be problem free, and the first sign of problems, they just jump ship. I wonder if there was any form of counselling involved there?

This is a good point. Marriage is all about compromise. It's about working together to solve differences. There are going to be problems. No way around that. It's how you deal with the problems that create a successful marriage. It's not always easy, and some genuine marriages fail, which is sad. I just wish everyone would sit down and seriously think about what they are doing before marriage and ask themselves one question, can I see myself with this person the rest of my life. If the answer is no, it's not going to work.

BTW I think there is some counseling involved there and you should send out the bill :lol:

 

[Brawny]

Notice most people saying marriage is good are married and those who aren't, aren't.

Hmmm

 

[CantGetAWii]

Marriage is nice and something I want to do eventually, but I don't want to rush into it.

The thing with some couples is they move in together and the guy assumes that once your living together your already married. Meanwhile the girl is constantly waiting for that next step.

Its comes with more baggage than anyone needs like not seeing your partner too often, having kids etc. but in the end its all worth it I find.

Again like the sex thread, people feel pressure to get married. Sometimes it happens after you have sex and pregnancy comes into play, getting married is the ideal next step but you both may be too young to have kids and a steady marriage.

Just be sure when you do it, its right.

 

[rukus]

no marriage will always be happy. people going into it thinking "love will get us through". but then they wake up to reality. no matter how 'perfect' the couple may be, there will always be some sort of problems. the issue with divorce is that it is now too easy. people see a problem, then bail, saying "(s)he wasnt the perfect (wo)man i married". sometimes the commitment you made to the other person is the only thing that gets you through.

as for the studies. most universities will not back up a study if it is not adequately substantiated.
another thing that came from the same studies were.
two couples are married.
both decide to divorce.
one couple decides to stick it out.
one couple divorces.
5 years later, the majority of couples that stayed together were hapy they stuck it out.
the majority of those that split were still not over the divorce, and were not 'happy'/

this isn't ALL cases, but the majority (i dont have a number, but generally a majrity means 55%+)

 

[AndThen?]

Notice most people saying marriage is good are married and those who aren't, aren't.

Hmmm

Yes, it's interesting to notice those who don't want to be married aren't married and those who do, are/will be. Fascinating observation.

 

[Brawny]

Yes, it's interesting to notice those who don't want to be married aren't married and those who do, are/will be. Fascinating observation.

...But even the people who didn't want to be changed their minds afterward...

 

[AndThen?]

...But even some of the people who didn't want to be changed their minds afterward...

^Fixed. Plenty of people never marry, and never want to marry.

And I know plenty of people who married and decided it wasn't their thing. It goes both ways.

 

[Brawny]

^Fixed. Plenty of people never marry, and never want to marry.

And I know plenty of people who married and decided it wasn't their thing. It goes both ways.

People in this thread, sweetheart.

 

[AndThen?]

People in this thread, sweetheart.

The demography of this thread fails, though, considering there's what- one, two married people in it? And the ridiculous majority of us are teenage boys?

 

[Chewy]

http://www.divorcerate.org/

The divorce rate in America for first marriage, vs second or third marriage
50% percent of first marriages, 67% of second and 74% of third marriages end in divorce, according to Jennifer Baker of the Forest Institute of Professional Psychology in Springfield, Missouri.”

According to enrichment journal on the divorce rate in America:
The divorce rate in America for first marriage is 41%
The divorce rate in America for second marriage is 60%
The divorce rate in America for third marriage is 73%

It works out for such a great majority of people!

 

[Brawny]

http://www.divorcerate.org/



It works out for such a great majority of people!

Er...what're you trying to say?